[ . . . ah. the lost look manages to get her to pause - and if he's not going to eat right away, she'll move the tray of food to her other side, so she can sit closer to him.
her fingertips touch his arm, a gentle brush first]
... then I will hope he is not monster. Even if all things are bad.
... we will have to find a way to save him from here, too.
[she tilts her head in slight confusion before she just offers up a smile, even if he can't see it on her face, she's hopeful that it shines through in her voice]
[ah... it's always nice to see asch smile - and she returns it, happily.]
... if you think so, then I am happy.
I think... if there is something to be stubborn about, it is people I care for. Важный. So important that I cannot stand back and let things happen, and pass me by.
she blinks a bit in confusion, tilting her head at the uncertainty that comes from him.]
Eh...?
[ . . . well, he's going through some stuff right now, isn't he? she wonders if it would be good for her to push or not.]
... mm. I will not make you talk but... if you change mind, I am here.
[she'll offer that, simply.]
... but I do not know if what you think of me is true. [she looks a little sheepish then - ] Нерешительный. I... am not someone good at moving forward.
[and she'll move to play with her hair almost self-consciously as her gaze drops to the floor, which is a lot more interesting than admitting her faults but.]
... Выбор. I am not good - at making choice for myself. For others, yes, if it will help them or not. Easy.
But... cannot do that for me, so - I am trying more here.
[it's a great question - and she notices the squeeze but she just looks all the more worried, like she's sad she'll disappoint him for not being able to give an answer]
.... do not know yet.
I have a dream - to find stars that no one has seen before. But... do not know what else to do. Even before I came here... I was told to be solo idol, away from my partner.
Oдиноко - but now... even more than before, it sounds lonely.
Mm... Anya is part of duet unit. Love Laika - I did everything with Minami. Идеально. She is beautiful and brave - when Asch talks about princess, I think of Minami first. She is good at everything and means very much to me.
We are part of big project - Cinderella Girls. Many girls... but company is going through change. New director looked at Cinderella Girls and said 'Anya, go solo'. So I will be without Minami, but my friends might not get to keep being idols...
But I do not think I shine enough on my own to be good - and I do not want to be alone.
[ . . . she looks a little more bothered by the time she's done talking though, shaking her head and trying to pull her hand out of his hold]
.... Небольшой. Small, silly problem. Not like this, or what other people do.
But Anya cannot solve even small problem - so I am not good at making choice.
[freeing one hand, he reaches out—hesitates, fingers curling back—then continues forward, reaching out, tucking the edge of his fingers under Anya's chin, and gently... lifting, until her eyes meet with his.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
constellates) wrote2020-02-28 08:43 pm
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her fingertips touch his arm, a gentle brush first]
... then I will hope he is not monster. Even if all things are bad.
... we will have to find a way to save him from here, too.
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ah.
hm.
--Asch looks away again, and sighs, a spackle of heat at his cheeks.]
Yeah, nya.
Everyone, nya.
[except him. but no one needs to know that.]
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Mm. Everyone to go home -
And a way for you to live again.
[she's not going to let it go]
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[so annoying!!!]
...Has anyone ever told you what an overly-stubborn girl you are, nya?
[but he's back to looking at her again, something almost
wistful in his voice.]
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Mm... no?
[not phrased like that anyway!]
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[not with her, at least.
his expression softens, and he
smiles.]
I think it suits you, nya.
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... if you think so, then I am happy.
I think... if there is something to be stubborn about, it is people I care for. Важный. So important that I cannot stand back and let things happen, and pass me by.
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[they're so close.
when did she get this close? he can practically hear her breathing, her hand on his arm, the smell of her hair--
when did she close the gap between them? because it was her.
it was all her.
...]
Anya--
[for a second, he looked like he wanted to... say? do? something??
and looks away again.]
--No, never mind, nya.
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she blinks a bit in confusion, tilting her head at the uncertainty that comes from him.]
Eh...?
[ . . . well, he's going through some stuff right now, isn't he? she wonders if it would be good for her to push or not.]
... mm. I will not make you talk but... if you change mind, I am here.
[she'll offer that, simply.]
... but I do not know if what you think of me is true. [she looks a little sheepish then - ] Нерешительный. I... am not someone good at moving forward.
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shakes his head.]
N-No, I was just going to say... thank you for the food, nya.
[THAT HE HASN'T TOUCHED??? but he moves on immediately.]
Is that true, or just what you think, nya?
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[and she'll move to play with her hair almost self-consciously as her gaze drops to the floor, which is a lot more interesting than admitting her faults but.]
... Выбор. I am not good - at making choice for myself. For others, yes, if it will help them or not. Easy.
But... cannot do that for me, so - I am trying more here.
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he reaches up, catching the hand twirling her hair carefully, ears twitching, tail gracefully arced over his head.]
And? What have you decided for yourself, nya?
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.... Not very much.
I thought I would not be idol - but if I have my hand, maybe I can. Неуверенный. But I still do not know if that is right for me.
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[he gives her hand a squeeze—a small, utterly missable squeeze—and lets it go.]
That's the only choice you have to make for yourself.
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.... do not know yet.
I have a dream - to find stars that no one has seen before. But... do not know what else to do. Even before I came here... I was told to be solo idol, away from my partner.
Oдиноко - but now... even more than before, it sounds lonely.
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...partner?
this is NOT the right time to ask that, because he's not an uncouth boor!!!]
What's wrong with dreaming of the stars, nya?
I...
[...]
You always surround yourself with people—would you really be happy on your own, nya?
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do it
please
that said that question makes her answer very quickly:]
Нет. No. To be by myself... I would not like it.
[she says that so fast]
... but.... it is chance not all idols get.
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[hmm.]
...Look at it in a different way: if you decline the opportunity, will that give someone else who's happy on their own the chance instead, nya?
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.... Сложный. Not that easy.
Wish it was.
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[...]
Is it something to do with your partner?
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Mm... Anya is part of duet unit. Love Laika - I did everything with Minami. Идеально. She is beautiful and brave - when Asch talks about princess, I think of Minami first. She is good at everything and means very much to me.
We are part of big project - Cinderella Girls. Many girls... but company is going through change. New director looked at Cinderella Girls and said 'Anya, go solo'. So I will be without Minami, but my friends might not get to keep being idols...
But I do not think I shine enough on my own to be good - and I do not want to be alone.
[ . . . she looks a little more bothered by the time she's done talking though, shaking her head and trying to pull her hand out of his hold]
.... Небольшой. Small, silly problem. Not like this, or what other people do.
But Anya cannot solve even small problem - so I am not good at making choice.
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somehow, anya not wanting to hold hands is ten times more worrying—so instead, he wraps both hands around hers, frowning.]
It's still your worries, nya. They're not less valid, nya.
But the Anya I know wouldn't let someone push her into doing something she doesn't want to, nya.
Even on you own, you're strong, Anya-nya.
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and she pauses, frowning a little. despite that, she nods.]
... I hope I will be the person you think I am, soon.
[her whole problem is not being sure she can fulfill expectations, but she wants to. she really wants to.]
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I think you already are.
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... mm.
Well... nice of you to say....
[she just needs to believe it]
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